JESUS & FAMILY VALUES

            Christians on the right were pushing the idea of “family values” at us for the past few years, as though it were a main tenant of the Bible.  So it’s time we looked at the Gospels themselves to see just what Jesus really said about the subject.  When we do, I’m afraid we’re going to be in for a bit of a shock.  For Jesus’ true passages on the subject go as follows:

            “Then one said to him, ‘Look, your mother and brothers stand outside wishing to speak to you.’  But Jesus answered and told him, ‘Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?’  And he stretched out his hand toward his disciples and said: ‘Here are my mother and my brothers!  For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my mother, sister, and brother.’” (Matthew 47-49; Luke 8: 19-21)

            “And it happened… a certain women from the crowd raised her voice and said to him, ‘Blessed is the womb that bore you, and the breasts that nursed you.’  But Jesus said, ‘More than that: Blessed are those who hear the word of God and keep it.’”  (Luke 11 27-28)

            “Do you suppose I came here to give peace on earth?  I tell you not at all, but rather division.  For from now on, five in one house will be divided:  three against two and two against three. Father will be divided against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, daughter-in-law against mother-in-law and mother-in-law against daughter-in-law.”  (Luke 12: 51-53)

            “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.”  (Luke 14: 26-27)

            In view of Jesus’ true sayings about family per se’ it appears certain religious groups have again written its own bible for its own personal and political uses.  That being the case, how can we now still humanely interpret Jesus own words about family in any true sense?  It should be obvious that taking such passages at literal face value can lead to confusion and despair. Instead, three realistic ways of interpreting Scripture’s mulit-leveled meanings are as follows: (1) Interpreting the passages in context of the situations and times they were written  (2) Then interpreting them in a broader sense appropriate to all times including our own.  (3) Finally, you can find how the passage relates to your own personal life and experience.

So let’s do so to find the real meanings.

Viewing the passages in relation to the times they were written: Scholars date Luke’s Gospel anywhere from 80 to 125 C.E., and Matthew’s somewhat earlier from about 85 to 90 C.E.  By then the main original apostles were martyred, and the fledgling, partially Jewish Church was struggling with rejection from the more mainstream Jews.  Therefore, Jewish Christians were often faced with criticism from their own families -- hence, the passages urging them to even forego their families if that were necessary to follow the Christ.  In that case some such passages may well have been inserted at that later time to exaggerate Jesus’ teachings against being too clannish to practice expanded love for all.  For instance Luke’s admonishment to hate one’s family is a gross exaggeration of an earlier Matthew’s passage stating: “He who loves his [family] more than me is not worthy of me.”  (Matthew 10: 37)

We should now look at such passages in the more expanded sense of Jesus

main teachings – i.e. his admonishing everyone for being too self-centered and clannish in general. 

Let’s face it: Even the most bigoted war-monger or mass murderer can have an abiding love for his own family, tribe, or clan, even if some within the clan are mean and unworthy.  Moreover, exclusive clannishness always begot bigotry, hatred for those different, and jingoistic wars. 

Therefore Jesus said; “If you love those who love you, what reward have you?  Do not even the tax collectors do the same?  And if you greet your brothers only, do you do anything special?  For don’t even the tax collectors do that too? 

When Jesus said to love your neighbor as yourself, they asked him “But who is our neighbor?” And Jesus gave the parable of the Good Samaritan, who was actually from the enemy tribe and religion! (Luke 10: 27-37)    In the same way Jesus equally taught the Samaritan women at the well, when it was known the Jews had no dealings with the Samaritans.  (John 4: 7 -9)    

Such teachings are especially vital in the shrinking world and pluralistic cultures of our own times.  For if all the diverse clans, tribes, cultures and religions do not soon reach out beyond themselves with the expanded tolerance and understanding necessary for peace – the Armageddon of world destruction will soon be upon all of us indeed.

In a more private, personal sense, such teachings can also help relieve feelings of guilt and despair in the midst of family strife.  For, Jesus’ statements aside, families do often suffer bitter internal conflicts where members turn against each other.  In such a case, your should of course first follow the Bible’s better known teachings of turning the other cheek and trying to make amends.  However, if you’ve sanctified yourself by sincerely making such noble attempts at reconciliation, and you are still treated badly -- you now do have Christ’s permission to disinherit and disown those members who irredeemably turned against you, and do so without guilt or self-recrimination.   There is only one clear acceptation to this rule: Never totally forsake your parents.  For here the Commandment clearly states, “Honor thy father and thy mother.”  If even they have betrayed you, final forgiveness in this case will secure your souls and theirs in final peace.

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